My first post for this year is a readers request. I also posted my reply to this letter at the end of this post. Read on. Enjoy!
Dear Marcuss,
I hope you will publish this letter of mine. I'm writing about Ben. I know he reads your blog regularly as he was the one who got me hooked. That is why I chose to ask you to post this letter so he can read it.
Ben and I are both in our twenties and we both work in Manila, Philippines. In fact, we used to be officemates. I've known him for almost two years and all the time, I've been in-love with him, although we are just friends and he has a girlfriend he intends to marry.
Marcuss, I can't help but fall in love with him. He's perfect! He's responsible, intelligent, resourceful, thoughtful, loving, sweet, caring, upright, kind, family-oriented, and a God-fearing individual. His good looks are just an added bonus. I can't believe such a man still exists today and I will forever be thankful for his friendship.
It is a pain to be so in-love with him because he and his girlfriend are perfect for each other and are so happy being together. I don't know if he's aware of my feelings for him, but winning his heart, I think, is out of the question. His girlfriend is too precious for him. Losing her would truly hurt him, and I don't want to see him in pain. I know, however, that a part of me wishes he would reciprocate my love, but he's just too good for me. He deserves someone better, like the girl he has now.
Knowing he's happy with her is enough consolation for me. I want his happiness even if it would mean my own despair. God knows how such I'm suffering. Writing this letter alone is already a torture. I've been trying very hard to forget him. I've done ways I know to free myself. But my heart is really stubborn, it would not listen to me. Marcuss, I haven't seen or talked with him for a long time and I thought his absence would somehow cool down the feeling, but it hasn't. I don't want to miss him, but I do miss him terribly. How can I forget him?
Whenever I see a place, a thing, or a situation, my mind automatically associates it with him. His memories occupy most of my waking and sleeping hours. His face pops into my mind in the middle of my lunch, when I'm talking with my friends, cleaning my house, or just doing something which has nothing to remind me of him. Odd, but true. I'm not bitter, Ate. I don't blame myself, him, nor God for this situation. As a matter of fact, I'm thankful. Painfully odd as it is, this situation has made me the mature person I am now. But I can't help ask myself why should someone fall for another when they are not meant for each other? Why Marcuss? Why?
You know, whenever I pray, I always ask God to help me let go of this love. I just want to feel the same way he feels for me... as a friend and nothing more. I know I can get through this because I believe that God wouldn't give me something He knows I couldn't handle. Someday I will be able to smile again without being hurt when I remember him. God has His reason for all of these and until I know the reasons, I want to hear words from you. Attached is my picture to show my sincerity and let you decide if am really not meant for his love.
Please Marcuss, help me.
Sincerely,Berta
Dear Berta,
You little piece of turd. Even my dogs asshole is prettier than you. I totally lost my appetite for a whole day after I looked at your photo. You're so ugly that the Boogeyman will probably have nightmares after seeing you.
I cannot do anything for you Berta, in fact it's Ben who I should be helping. I should help him get away and hide from you. You ugly bitch! The only way that I can assist you is to refer you to my dogs vet. He can probably put you to sleep painlessly.
I hope this is the last letter. The next time you send me one I will personally visit you and end your misery myself.
Regards,
Marcuss
